Saturday - the day after the Crucifixion of Jesus

MARK 16:10

"She went and told those who had been with Him and who were mourning and weeping."

Saturday - the day after the Crucifixion of Jesus



      I always feel, well, different telling people what I do for a living. It's different and sometimes awkward on several levels. First, as a man, we are often asked as one of the first questions to establish our identity or standing in a group or situation; "What do you do for a living?" Secondly, it's often an awkward or uncomfortable moment before I hear a response to what I have just told them. Sometimes, the response is, "Oh...I could never do something like that. You have to be the right, special, different kind of person to do that job." Maybe, it's a chuckle and silence, and then, "Better you than me. I couldn't do that." After a brief talk of how I got into my line of work, they might tell me "Thank you, for what you do. I know it must be a hard or difficult job for you. You must be the right person for the job, or you would have quit so long ago." Most people never ask for more details, my best experience, my worst appointment, if I had ever seen anything miraculous. Usually there's another pause, and I ask them what they do or move the conversation a different direction. Now don't get me wrong, I am proud of what do. I've done this for over six years, and my heart loves being there. I don't want you to think of me any more or less, because of my career. I didn't choose it for myself, God placed me squarely where I am today. You see, I work in the half-way places of life. I walk with people in the in-between times. If I had been there in Jesus' time, I would have been there in the room with the disciples, or maybe with Joseph of Arimathea.

Alta Smith, Chandler Slack, Betty Winer, Ervin Burr, Ford Tune Jr., Betty Winter, Catherine Valentine, Harold Hunt, Norma Thomas, Ruth Jensen, Roy Edwards, Susan Matthess. I do not forget you. I remember each of you, and so many more.

I don't want to be boastful or prideful. I don't want to be arrogant or have a God-complex. But truly hear me when I say, sometimes I have to be Jesus to someone, when their expected Jesus has already left them. When family, spouse, lover, friends, acquaintances have left or never shown up, as they hoped - I am asked to be there.

     I am one who visits, when there's no one home, and your loved one can tell me how scared or happy they really are, without worrying that it will scare you. I am the one who lets them cry and curse, cuss and praise, sit in silent tears, or hold my hand humming a hymn. I am the one who comes to the room, when the breathing is slower, time has slowed to a crawl, the clock ticks moments by like a dripping faucet. It won't stop and it constantly reminds you that its broken, your broken, life is broken.

      I am the one who comes to the bedside, no family, no friends, no one but nurses and aides and me, if I get there in time. Everyone is gone in their life or no one wants to be there to see them or everyone lives to far away to come. Life and circumstances or sins has separated them from all others. An alcoholic, a drug addict, a child molester, a veteran, a widow or widower with no children, a prison inmate, a sister or brother estranged from their family, an atheist, a homosexual, or whatever the accusations or sin.

      I am the one who has to listen, to both sides of the arguments. I am asked to share my opinions, judgments, justifications, scriptures to back up your side, to weigh to one side or the other of why something should or shouldn't be. Most often I choose neither, but reflect their arguments back to them, and let them choose.

      I am the one the family begs to hear if they confessed, asked for forgiveness, gave up their sins, agreed to their demands, made concessions, changed the will, or was at peace before they were gone. I have to tell them if they said anything at all. And sometimes I don't have anything to tell them.
 

     I am the one who speaks for them. Either their mind is gone, or the ability to speak. Instead I share with them. I share their grief, their pain, their tears, their sorrows. And I try to give them my joys, my hopes, my peace, my hymns, my scriptures, and my Lord. I am the one who has to tell the truth to them, and to their family. That they are going soon. They have days or hours. That they are gone. That I was able to share a prayer, a scripture, a psalm, a hymn, a hand hold, a squeeze, a lock of eyes, a smile, a breath, the Truth, the Omega. And that's what I tell the family.
 

     I have a different scripture, devotional, or story for them all. I have a different experience and encounter with each one of them. The names I shared above each had a testimony, a story, a time I walked with them, in the in-betweens of their lives. One I was able to help her marry her true love, and memorialize her weeks later. The others to walk with them, and now, remember them.

No one is the same. Ever. Sometimes I am blessed enough to share a few days or even months with them. I get to know them, their pain, their fears, their joys, their regrets.

I am a chaplain for hospice. I take many roles and responsibilities, in the in-betweens and half-ways.
 

     The disciples were there, in the room together, grieving and mourning the loss of Jesus. A couple of them were at the cross, watching his mocking, scorning death. Maybe a few had to be working or with their family. Some were hiding from shame, having denied any attachment or connection to Him. One maybe just returned from helping Jesus' mother, emotionally crushed, get home safely from the crowds and questions. They were there, with all their doubts, their grief, their insecurities, their questions...and no Jesus to help them. We have all been there. A time in-between two places, to times, two circumstances.

 

     It would be so wonderful if God would simply promise to us that we would never go through difficult times. But we do go through great and terrible difficulties all of the time, and God constantly warns us of these dangers and difficulties in His Holy Word.

     Peter wrote in his first letter (1 Pet 4:12) “Dear friends, do not be surprised at the painful trial you are suffering, as though something strange were happening to you.” The Bible constantly tells us that there will be difficult times in life, and Psalm 23 voices such a warning. It does not say, “God will keep you from danger,“ but rather it describes that there will come times, and they come for all of us, when we feel like we are walking through a dark, dangerous valley -- a “valley of the shadow of death.“

       But what the Word of God does make very clear is that as we move through such times, God is with us. God is there to comfort us and sustain us. His very name at birth was Immanuel – God with us. And scripture reminds us that He came to live among us, to make is dwelling among us, and ultimately, after His resurrection, he continues to live with us as the Holy Spirit. And it isn't to say that God gives us these difficulties, these circumstances, these trials. A lot of times, I hear people making God the cause or to blame. Whether it is, "God gave her cancer because she was so mean to us," or "God took my 2-year old, because he needed another angel." I know that often these words are just a coping mechanism, or just BS - a belief system. I don't believe either are the truth. I believe God has a part in our circumstances, but more often, using those circumstances to bring out good - peace, patience, goodness, kindness, gentleness, fruits of the Spirit. Most often to bring the everlasting of faith, hope, and love and truths to death and difficulties.

     Sometimes these things just come upon us because of life, natural process of disease, of accidents and tragedy, of natural disasters, or even of horrible life-afflicting choices. I don't want to claim to know and completely understand it all. I don't want to sound cliché. The entire Bible is filled with our favorite narratives or characters falling into or coming into difficult circumstances. A few of them are put to the point of death. The Psalms are pages of pain, heartache, searching for God or answers. The Bible isn't silent on pain and suffering, it is THE example of life in pain and suffering. "Hear my prayer, O Lord. Give me an open ear. I waited patiently for the Lord. No health in my bones, because of my sin. I am ready to fall and my pain is ever before me. I confess. I am sorry. Do not forsake me! O my God do not be far from me! Hurry to come and help me! But for you, O Lord, do I wait." These and others are perhaps the same words of the disciples in the room together. They are the same words we struggle to declare, in our own trials.

Paul wrote many times, seeking to encourage Christians in trials, suffering, facing prison and even death. James wrote much on it as well.

Romans 8:18 (ESV)

18 For I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worth comparing with the glory that is to be revealed to us.

Romans 8:26 (ESV)

26 Likewise the Spirit helps us in our weakness. For we do not know what to pray for as we ought, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words.

Romans 8:28 (ESV)

28 And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose.

Romans 8:37-39 (ESV)

37 No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us.

38 For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers,

39 nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.

2 Timothy 4:5 (ESV)

5 As for you, always be sober-minded, endure suffering, do the work of an evangelist, fulfill your ministry.

James 1:2-4 (ESV)

2 Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds,

3 for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness.

4 And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.

     So on this Saturday, the disciples are in-between. They are caught in-between the Jesus they knew and expected, and the Jesus whom has died. They were halfway between hope in the Messiah and now heartache. They are in-between what they knew and what they don't know is coming next. And it is frightening, doubtful, the arguments about what Jesus promised and what each of them believed would happen. Their minds and souls in the sick tossing, like when they were in the boat amidst the storm, while Jesus slept. But they are hoping, praying, and holding on to faith, that everything Jesus said would be true and come to pass. They hung on to each other.

     And now, He is again asleep, in death. And they cry, "Master, Master, we are perishing!" (Luke 8:22-25) And what about you?

     Are you caught in the halfway or the in-between today? Are you shut in the room, lost in doubts, depression, despair? Have you hopes and expectations been utterly destroyed? Maybe you lost your job and have nothing to save yourself. A diagnosis has brought fear beyond any you have ever felt. The crushing monotony of the same routine day after day, keeps you swallowing guilt and depression, wondering when it will end. Today, is one more day of dealing with pain, nausea, and pills. You feel trapped with no one to help you take care of what has fallen on your shoulders to carry, and you don't know how long you can carry the burden.

      So we all live in-between. We are between blessings and curses, sufferings and healings, the good and bad of life's days. We walk tall, we stumble, we curl up in a heap sobbing on the floor, we crawl, we lie in bed all day, we grieve, we mourn, we hurt, we thirst for truth. Our in-between moments are our every days. We don't get a break from in-between or half-way moments, because that's life. We have big blessing moments and big trials or falls, but where we really live is on the slopes going up or going down. Those slopes can be terrifying or exhilarating. Funny thing to note, the Bible records the big moments, the most important moments, in the ministry of Jesus and the lives of His disciples. We often gloss over or forget the in-betweens and the halfway moments that would have happened. The "everday living" moments. The walking between cities or crowds. The daily ins-and-outs of Jewish life and traditions. Lunch with mom and dad. Visiting Rabbi and asking for prayer before the trip across the lake. Going to synagogue daily and weekly. The regular, the mundane, the routine living. But do you know what it also didn't record?

The Bible doesn't record all those moments and times Jesus ministered, did something miraculous, spoke grace, forgave, healed, set free, invited someone in, spoke the Truth, and confronted accusers to release condemnation. It does record,
²⁵  "Now there are also many other things that Jesus did. Were every one of them to be written, I suppose that the world itself could not contain the books that would be written."
John 21:25 (ESV). What if Jesus was trying to show us what we can do, everyday, with one another? What if our greatest accomplishments, that all the books could not contain, might be not the big ministry/blessing moments - but rather how we lived each day with each other?

 

      I have worked a long time as a chaplain, and it's different every day. There is no easy answers to it all. But we know Jesus suffered, the disciples grieved, Jesus was tortured in His soul, in Gethsemane, and asked very humanly if God would find another way to accomplish His plan for redemption - and then Christ sacrificed His own will for God's will. I think we have to do that a little every day. We can allow God to bring some good out of our trials and suffering. Again, I am not wanting to make light of your pain and circumstances, but I want you to have faith in them, and know you have control and choices. 

      Today, remembering that many are without Christ, and many are suffering trials, sufferings, and circumstances. If you could do one thing, for the one person you might see or talk to today who going through that, what would it be? Maybe someone comes to mind as you read this, and you could reach out to them. What would you do? Like me, in my career, you could be the one person to be Jesus for them, when everyone else is gone or no one has come. They don't need you to save them or give them all the answers, they just need to be together with you. Isn't that what church is? A place where those whom believe, hope, and trust in the gospel - living in-between the Resurrection and the Return - is what we all need. Many trials, sufferings and struggles go on for days or years, even. Some are for a moment. A lot of us are still like the disciples: lost, grieving, without a hope in the world, without peace, in a storm, or quiet suffering. But they are reaching out for Someone, for Jesus.

Will you be Jesus for them? Today, all week, all month, all year; will you tell them: I am listening. I am here with you. I am here to feed you today. I am here to bathe, bandage, and clothe you. I am here to shelter you. I am here to let you sleep. I am here to give you grace. I am here to forgive you. I am here to hold your hand. I am here to take over for you. I am here to be your mother, father, sister, or brother. I am here to let you cry. I am here to help you say to the storm, "Peace, be still." I am here to sing to you, read to you, let you hear God's truth. I am who God wants me to be for you. I AM sent me to you.

I AM, THAT I AM...

by Jen Foss

They need you today to come into their room and do as James asks:

James 5:13-20 (ESV)

13 Is anyone among you suffering? Let him pray. Is anyone cheerful? Let him sing praise.

14 Is anyone among you sick? Let him call for the elders of the church, and let them pray over him, anointing him with oil in the name of the Lord.

15 And the prayer of faith will save the one who is sick, and the Lord will raise him up. And if he has committed sins, he will be forgiven.

16 Therefore, confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person has great power as it is working.

17 Elijah was a man with a nature like ours, and he prayed fervently that it might not rain, and for three years and six months it did not rain on the earth.

18 Then he prayed again, and heaven gave rain, and the earth bore its fruit.

19 My brothers, if anyone among you wanders from the truth and someone brings him back,

20 let him know that whoever brings back a sinner from his wandering will save his soul from death and will cover a multitude of sins.